- Do you feel alone and disconnected from your partner?
- Do you have the same argument over and over, and nothing ever gets resolved?
- Do you long for the feeling of being valued and loved that you used to have?
You didn’t sign up for this.
You didn’t plan for your marriage to fall apart this way. Your relationship began as most do, with stars in your eyes and fairy-tale-like dreams of happily ever after.
And then things started to change.
Perhaps children came and demanded time and attention. Maybe one of you got promoted at work and began spending more time away. Perhaps someone experienced a crisis of health or finance or family. And now you struggle to communicate what you feel and need. Constant arguing only drives the two of you farther apart. You feel like you aren’t being heard or understood, and eventually one of you shuts down and refuses to talk. The distance became wider, and you find yourselves in a never-ending cycle of isolation and disconnection. You wonder if this will ever get better. You may even feel hopeless.
Relationships are HARD Work!
All relationships will have times of difficulty and struggle. It’s inevitable. Life becomes busy, schedules become full, and you lose touch. What seems like the natural ebb and flow of marriage becomes harder and harder to manage, creating a change in the relationship. This change can lead to communication issues, arguments, and even more distance. Perhaps, over time, one or both of you allow other interests to consume larger amounts of time until the relationship becomes neglected and ignored. An affair or pornography use can damage trust to what seems beyond repair, leading you to the brink of divorce.
There is a vulnerability in intimate relationships that makes asking for help downright scary. But with the help of a competent and compassionate couples’ therapist you can get back to feeling connected and happy in your marriage.
Things CAN Get Better
All couples go through challenges. As a couples’ therapist, I understand and have dealt with many of the issues that couples face, both personally and professionally. In our sessions, we’ll discuss each partner’s needs, worries and wants. Using empathy and validation, I’ll create a safe place to explore the needs and fears behind the arguments, allowing you and your partner to soften and understand each other. I will help you to communicate with each other from a softer, more vulnerable place in which you can feel heard and be more open to listening.
Because it’s never about the dishes. Or the money. Or the in-laws. It’s about connection. It’s about safety, trust and vulnerability. Together, we can bring you back to the intimacy, love and connection you thought you had lost.